Sunday, March 2, 2014

Huffing Poe’s Law

As cited in the Great and Powerful Wikipedia, Poe’s Law is “an Internet adage reflecting the idea that without a clear indication of the author's intent, it is difficult or impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.”

Conservapedia states it more generally as, “It is impossible to tell for certain the difference between genuine stupidity and a parody of stupidity.”

This maxim is most often sarcastically invoked in response to fundamental religious statements, but I’ve come across a case that genuinely had me stumped.

While President Obama’s approval ratings are sinking faster than Ted Kennedy’s Delmont 88, it seems that some people are still strapped to their blue Kool-Aid IVs.

The following remarks are all from one “That Old Navy Guy” (if he’s a vet, I appreciate his service, and if he’s a model from those lame clothing commercials, I appreciate his campiness), commenting on various stories in a particularly Lenin-leaning news aggregate that rhymes with Puffington Boast.

Take a deep breath, now.

“The vast majority of people who have used the Affordable Care Website have been able to find affordable health care that offers excellent coverage. Difficulties that occured on the state level was the result of local problems (90% were republican states that were doing everything to make the program look bad) and the President was able to personally fix it for them. It is actually difficulty to find someone who has had a bad experience with it (not counting the "actors" that Faux News employes to spread lies and deceiptfull information). People are calling the entire Obama Care Project a complete success that has exceeded all expectation. Even if our President Obama had never done anything else (and his many achievements are too numerous to count) the Affordable Care Act would cement his status as the top President of all times. Many people who have employer bases insurances are attempting to enroll in Obamacare since it is so much better than most employers offer. President Obama has exceeded all expectations of being President and he has set the bar extremely high for future Presidents. There will probably not be another republican elected President in the next 100 years because of the way that President Obama has improved life in this country. Americans are proud of Barack Obama.”

“He [President George Bush] is the reason that veterans are in such dire situations. It was through [his] actions that he got us into two wars and then blocked them from accomplishing their mission. He hated the troops and majority of troops depised him. He often refused to even acknowledge their presence. Compare that to President Obama who has done more for the the troops than any other President in history. He is the most admired and respected Commander In Chief in history. President Obama knows and understands the problems facing the troops. When the republicans cut the COLA of retirees it was President Obama who found a way replace it. When republicans talk about cutting the medical benefits of military, their families and retirees it is President Obama who is making them eligible for the Affordable Care Act and its available programs. George Bush was the worst thing that ever happened to the military. He knew nothing about them and openly disrespected them. He should be tried as the true criminal he was not only to the military but the entire population. We are fortunate that Barack Obama was there to lead us from the darkness caused by bush.”

“President Obama continues to be the most productive and influential of all previous Presidents. He has achieved more and done more to improve the lifes of Americans during his Presidency than anyone else has ever achieved. This is why he is constantly ranked the most admired man and respected leader in the world. He knows the one way to cut our dependence on foreign oil is by improving the gas mileage of our cars. Starting with fleets of commercial vechicles which will benefit all of us. His attempt to do this rivals JFK's goal of reaching the moon during the 1960's. Each passing day marks an achievement of Barack Obama in his quest to improve this country.”

“Global warming and that it is heavily influenced by human actions has gone beyond the debating stage. Now the majority of all qualified scientists acknowledge that man is responsible for it. Anyone who denies it is either very stupid or just refuses to accept the facts. Man is responsible for it and man can also control it. If the world continues to ignore the warnings of those such as Al Gore than life on this earth will cease to exist because of the damage we have done.”

“People need to back our President on this. He is the only one in history to come this close to obtaining peace in the middle east. The entire world is waiting in anticipation for the outcome of our President's actions. More sanctions are NOT the answer but listen to President Obama and open a dialogue with Iran to find our common ground. Our President has done more for world peace than any other person in the entire world. He has earned the admiration and respect of the entire world. He has certainly shown why the entire world awarded him his Nobel Peace Prize for his ability to make the world a better place.”

If it weren’t for the commenter’s unwavering lack of ironic cognizance, I would swear that Frank J. was doing some slumming.

(see what I did with the emoticon there — I don’t really think Frank would actually... oh, never mind)

1 comment:

  1. had me wondering if Janeane Garofalo had drifted in from IMAO. except for the lack of caps.