NP Ancient Estates
We here at NukingPolitics HQ are ever-curious, omni-adventurous, ultra-capitalistic, and at least reasonably bright, and it’s high time we started bragging about it, in a reserved and dignified manner of course. Also, it's time to cash in!
We all know the old adage “History repeats, and those who do not learn from history will not be in position to profit from this.” So with an eye towards taking advantage of the rise in Global Political Chaos (GPC), as well as the impending Global Cooling (GC) climate trend, we thought it would be a fantastic idea to review our planet for "transitional opportunities", as it were, in order to maximize NP shareholder value.
My first suggestion was that we go on a cheap-property real estate hunt. We started with Egypt, and it turns out there's LOTS of cheap property around, much of which are in areas GPC and GC are expected to cause significant future value swings.
To capitalize on this, we plan to "restore" (ha!) some of the lost cities we at NP “discovered” (1) in Egypt a few years ago. They're south of Baris, and not far from Ezbet Dush, and quite a few of them can be viewed on Google Maps, many of which date back to Neolithic times.
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| Future resort at the heart of NP Ancient Estates - click to enlarge |
That dot out to the left is an ancient well which we’ll probably have to re-drill, at least to provide water during the construction phase, but who knows? With the aquifers refilling that might not be a necessity! Speaking of which, if the Nubian Aquifer System underlying Egypt’s Western Desert oases resurfaces, which is likely, we should probably consider replacing several of the ancient dams and restoring Egypt to its Biblical role as “breadbasket of the Middle East”. We’d re-cement Egypt’s position as an American ally, and give Israel some breathing room, all for the approximate cost of building a fishing resort in Texas. We can even call the resulting reservoir “NP Lake” but will tell the local authorities that stands for “New Providence” just to avoid ruffling too many feathers (2).
There are in fact many ancient well sites, some of which were still working as recently as World War II, and all of which are within the territory of (working title, we’ll have to get the Marketing gurus on hammering out a proper name) “NP Ancient Estates”.
Here's a sample from our "well restoration project list", by coordinates:
To capture global attention, we intend to approach the market neighborhood-by-neighborhood, starting with the "Ancient Walled City of Keln".
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| Ancient Keln - Click to Embiggen |
Far to the north, a short drive from the ancient fortress of Tall Dush, we'll have "Madina Mayyit Almshi" (also known as Ghybawbahburg) for those wanting a hillside view, which not-coincidentally encompasses part of an ancient grave yard, perfect for amateur archaeologists!
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| WalkingDeadville - Enlarge if you dare! |
East and slightly south of Ghybawbahburg will be planted the holly orchards of "Hwlibastan", where by using modern irrigation technology we will recapture the grandeur of this once verdant region!
Northeast of both Hwlibastan and Madina Mayyit Almshi will be the elite resort community of "Asadullah". Situated hard upon the ancient Elephantine Road, the property will feature a completely restored Caravanserai hotel on its western slope.
For those seeking more isolated homes with a greater variety of scenery, we'll offer "My Jewel Sayyida" (technically "Mjhwl Sayyida"), where the evening wind howling through the rocks is reminiscent of the voice of the legendary Unknown Lady of old, calling from deep within the dune sea.
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| Hwlibastan |
Northeast of both Hwlibastan and Madina Mayyit Almshi will be the elite resort community of "Asadullah". Situated hard upon the ancient Elephantine Road, the property will feature a completely restored Caravanserai hotel on its western slope.
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| Asadullah Resort |
For those seeking more isolated homes with a greater variety of scenery, we'll offer "My Jewel Sayyida" (technically "Mjhwl Sayyida"), where the evening wind howling through the rocks is reminiscent of the voice of the legendary Unknown Lady of old, calling from deep within the dune sea.
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| The Domain of the Mysterious Woman |
You can almost imagine where the dairies, creameries, and cheese factories of ancient "Laban Kariha" once stood, prior to the desolation wrought by Khargan invaders. The Labaniyy ruins are still connected by the remnants of waterways to a village where vast herds of Aurochs and Urus once grazed.
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| The Khargans were rather intolerant of the dairy arts. |
Appropriately enough, the western-most neighborhood we will develop will be the estates of "Aardhh Khshbayh Aryzwna", Sparsely settled and with over-sized tracks, the homes of Aryzwna will be hauntingly familiar to anyone from the Western States of America.
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| Beautiful, wide-open Aryzwna! |
We also intend to construct both luxury homes and a much-needed water park at Mharba Falls. Since the Nubian Aquifer System contains both brine and sweet (fresh) water reserves (3), we consider the options for incorporating sea life into the park to be limitless.
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| Future site of the Mharba Falls waterpark |
Finally, in the unsettled mountains to the east, we will establish the "Qaniss Wildlife and Game Preserve", because these days people expect large land developers to do such things.
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| Qannis |
This is going to be a grand undertaking, and not our only one!
Remember to check back for further exploits of the NP Intrepid Adventure Team!
(1) We're using “discovered” here in the “We live in the USA, some of us are addicted to Google Earth, and none of our friends available for sudden consultation were Egyptologists, nor could we quickly locate any literature regarding the ancient history of this region online because it is too far South of the Baris-to-Kharga kingdoms to show up in anything we could get my hands on” sense, and NOT the “the locals know nothing about this” sense, because they very likely do and always have.
(2) Honestly, I’d considered just throwing up a modern dam making use of the natural boundary wall to the South at 24.378989, 30.744893, and turning all of Dakhlah’s “New Valley Governorate” into the “New Inland Sea Governorate”, but realized that would just drown all this wonderful real estate, as well as kill all its ancillary value as an artifact hunter/tourist trap gold mine. Except for scuba divers.
(3) I have no idea how, but it does. I can't imagine how sphagettified the underlying strata must be!
(2) Honestly, I’d considered just throwing up a modern dam making use of the natural boundary wall to the South at 24.378989, 30.744893, and turning all of Dakhlah’s “New Valley Governorate” into the “New Inland Sea Governorate”, but realized that would just drown all this wonderful real estate, as well as kill all its ancillary value as an artifact hunter/tourist trap gold mine. Except for scuba divers.
Special thanks to the NP Intrepid Adventure Team Staff, and Harvey from IMAO.US, for unwittingly providing me with a goldmine of property names, except for Keln, because I don't know what "Keln" means. Also thanks to Google Translate.
Still an exponentially better deal than the administration's with Iran.
ReplyDeleteGood plan, you are welcome to start some day soon.
ReplyDeleteI'm pleased to say this article has been picked up by the Egypt Property Page!
ReplyDeletehttp://paper.li/eg_propertypage/1354727245?edition_id=11770020-41ac-11e5-9350-0cc47a0d1605