Tuesday, September 18, 2012

And Barry Wept: An Excerpt Part 2

so this is another excerpt from my novel, I hope you enjoy it.  this part took me almost 20 minutes to write so you better appreciate it.

chapter 2
And the Biden Played On

The sun was beating down on the 12th hole with an intense heat that could only come from global warming, and totally not summer at all. The president stretched out a bit as his secret service detail looked around for suspicious activity in the area. Normally on a man, khaki shorts are a bit unflattering, but this man made them (ironically) work.

Still sitting in the golf cart, Joe Biden could be seen getting frustrated with angry birds on his cell phone. “THIS GAME CHEATS BARACK!" "I know Joe, its not fair for you. Next week I'll have my team call the boys and they can program a new version for you”.

“Jim, Steve, are we all set here?” said the president. “Yes sir, the area is safe."

"Safer than a Libyan consulate I would imagine.” Everyone turned at Joe and looked at him like he was a jerk, because that joke was way too soon. “Now Joe, we don't say things like that in public. It's not polite” the president said with a stern look on his face.

“Oh I know, but, c'mon it was funny, I was thinking of using it at my next stump speech”.

“Joe I don't think that's a good idea, now lets move on, we're only on our first round and we need to get another one in before I start doing my job”. Joe looked a bit puzzled, “Barack, don't you think that maybe you should take this presidency thing a bit more serious? I mean unemployment is still about eight percent, there is chaos in the middle east, we're about to get our credit downgraded again, and Mitt Romney is nipping at our heels in the polls; and you know, I really should be preparing for that debate with Paul Ryan”.

The president cracked a cool and calm smile, because that's what he does and people love him for it. “Joe, don't worry about any of that. Soon we're going to have an army of reporters doing our dirty work for us in exposing Mitt and Paul as the racist homophobes they are”.

“But Barack,” Joe said with a puzzled look on his face, “ I don't think they are racist, or homophobic”. The president cracked an even bigger smile on his face, “Joe, that doesn't matter at all... that doesn't matter at all”.

Then he started cackling loudly with an evil fiendish laugh and out of nowhere thunder and lighting started striking and stuff

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