Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Nuke the Punchline - We Must Track Immigration....Just Kidding.....

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, so it is time to choose the winners of the last one:

President Obama threatened to veto the new immigration bill unless...?

#5 Johnny45: it raised taxes.

#4 burt: it includes a special clause forbidding any investigation into his overstaying his student visa.

#3 can of spam: they rescheduled the signing ceremony around his tee times.

#2 Dohtimes: it includes a money back guarantee for anyone that is disappointed after arrival.

And my favorite straight line of the day was from Oppo:

President Obama threatened to veto the new immigration bill unless...there is a mechanism for rigid oversight and tracking -- no, wait, that's for gun legislation.

Cookies to Oppo!

(btw, an extra cookie for mentioning the "I'm Just a Bill" School House Rock song that I used to watch on Saturday mornings and taught me everything I know about politcs ;)


My favorite Nuking Politics post of the day was This is Supposed to be a Happy Occasion. Let's Not Quibble About Who Killed Who. (What Can Men Do Against Such Reckless Hate) by Lactose the Intolerant.

Cookies to Lactose! (Which kind do you want?)

(By the way, if you wanna hear more about my sweet seven dwarves you can do so here. :)


The best punchline for the last Nuking Politics straight line was from : Bob in Feenicks.

Since Tax Day is over, Joe Biden...can finally eat the chocolate in his gold coins.

Cookies to Bob!


Now here's a line for you guys to play with:

When all 5 living Presidents attend the George W. Bush Presidential Center dedication...


  1. ...Carter kept saying, "Which one of you is Reagan?"

    ...Carter said, "Anyone got an oar?... I see a rabbit."

  2. ...the highlight of the evening will be the "5 men enter, one man leaves" cage fight finale.

  3. Looks like Jimmy Carter passed gas, and everyone else shuffled away...

  4. Bush41: "Duke"
    Obama: "Duke"
    Clinton: "Duke of Earl"
    Carter: "Duke Duke"

  5. Carter said, "I used to be a world traveler too.... before I took an arrow to the knee."

  6. ...the only question is who will be left after all the busts get sent back. "Hey Laura how do you spell Kenya"?

  7. ...there will be two Bushes, two Carters, and the first black President of the United States.

  8. ...people will realize that Jimmy Carter was really president and not just a scary urban legend.

    ...Bill Clinton will arrive in his own personal jet, Air Force Giggity.

    1. FYI: I just want to point out I spell 'Feenicks' with a 'c' -for future reference

    2. Geez I'm sorry Bob! You got ME with the grammar hammer. :) I can't believe I missed that. Thanks.

    3. Updated...and extra cookies to you for pointing out my mistake.

  9. ...Thunderdome rules will apply

  10. will be excluded while the Bushes, Carter and Obama sit Bill down, tell him that they really do love him, and they aren't there to judge, but he really really has to stop chasing the interns around.

  11. there will be a pot luck at the end, someone will bring a kettle, and the charges of racism will begin to fly

  12. the secret service will go to great pains to prevent Carter and Obama from getting too close to each other thus causing a singularity to form