Saturday, July 19, 2014

Skein of Terror! Part Deux

An atheist group is peeved by the Supreme Court’s ruling that people who own a company can’t be forced to relinquish their religious tenets concerning the sanctity of innocent human life, while they’re essentially being forced to pay for their employees’ healthcare.

This calls for a symbolic protest — but hashtags are so two months ago.

The Secular Coalition for America has come up with a campaign so secular and coalitiony that it will strike the fear of...uh...nothingness into anybody who dares to have a theistic thought.

What is this one weird trick they have up their collective secular sleeve?

The organization is asking supporters to knit symbolic building blocks in order to “rebuild the wall of separation between church and state.”

The goal of the “Knit a Brick” campaign is to “harness outrage” over the outrageously outrageous high court’s Hobby Lobby decision.

If the group receives 400 bricks, they’ll schlep them to the Supreme Court. If they collect 800, they’ll bring the brick brocades to the blockheads in Congress. And if they manage to crank out 1,200, some lucky White House staffers will receive a lifetime supply of largely secular Jihadi Barbie prayer rugs.

You can’t knit or crochet? No problem. Just send a donation of $10 to $100, and they’ll do it for you. How much for a block half the size of a potholder? Sounds like a good gig. My mom could’ve been a millionaire, with all the ripple blankets she made.

I won’t link to their Facebook page because I don’t want to disturb anyone’s dinner; the photos are too reminiscent of that Obamacare campaign — you know, the one with the writing on the hands that one might expect of an insecure middle school girl.

I’m wondering if the organization would welcome woolens from just anybody, or do they only accept silk from their nontheistic ilk — not that there’s anything wrong with that.

I believe people should be free to serve or provide for whomever they choose. I’m totally with S.E. Cupp and Penn Jillette on issues like this. Does that make me more of a freethinker than the folks in this coalition?

Still, I’m not sure that the organizers would decide to prominently display my humble submission:

You didn't knit that.

1 comment:

  1. I claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may. Or nothing at all.