Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Nuke the Punchline: Obama Gave

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

To get people to vote for him, Obama gave...

#5 Sharky: ...everyone a free cell phone and a two-for-1 coupon from Taco De Perro.

#4 AwesometificAmerican: ...vouchers exempting their children from having to eat Michelle approved school lunches.

#3 FormerHostage: ...your address to a local New Black Panthers chapter.

#2 g: ...dead and imaginary people the right to vote.

And the best punchline goes to Stephen M. St. Onge:

To get people to vote for him, Obama gave...
  Twelve pollsters spinning, 
  Eleven Panthers scowling,
  Ten reporters lying, 
  Nine judges fighting, 
  Eight taxman milking (us), 
  Seven friends a’stealing, 
  Six guns a’walking, 
  Four new excuses, 
  Three fund raisers, 
  Two lying memoirs, 
  And an economy crushed by a tree. 

Congratulations Stephen!

Now here's a line for you guys to meddle with:

Did you hear what Obama is planning to put in his Presidential Library?


  1. An iPod full of his speeches...

    No, that's it. Just an iPod full of his speeches.

  2. Darn you Harvey. You just beat me to that one. I guess great minds and all...

  3. No, and I don't want to.

  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

  5. I'll try again, this time invoking Grammar!

    If I'm successful in my intention to have him declared an Antipresident (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antipope), we'll never have to actually answer this question.

  6. A cooking section. -Guess what the main ingredient is. (woof)

  7. 239,000 copies of the Audacity of Hope, paid for by taxpayers like you.

  8. His cherished Koran. Autographed by OBL

    His cherished Rules for Radicals signed by Bill Ayers.

    His testicles, donated by Michelle

    A locked box containing copies of his college records and long form BC.

    Amb Chris Stevens Death Certificate