Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Nuke the Punchline: Naked Body Scanners

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

The TSA is doing away with naked body scanners. They'll be replaced by...

#5 blarg: ...A stage with a brass pole.

#4 tomg51: ...something slower, less effective, more costly, assembled by union hands and supplied by someone’s friend from Chicago.

#3 plentyobailouts: ...two midgets and a flashlight.

#2 CTCompromise: ...arming every passenger, so potential hijackers will be out-numbered.

And the best punchline goes to HokieGomer:

The TSA is doing away with naked body scanners. They'll be replaced with such diverse elements as fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Obama, and nice red uniforms.

(Again...that never gets old).

Congratulations, HokieGomer!


The best punchline for the last Nuking Politics straight line was from Harvey:

The most surprising thing that happened at Obama's second inauguration was those 4 guys on horses hanging out at the back of the crowd, chuckling quietly to themselves.

Congratulations Harvey! You get no points...


Now here's a line for you guys to ponder quietly...

To celebrate MLK day, Biden...


  1. .....napped all day so that he could have a dream, too.

  2. lip sync'd, "Ya di buckety. Rum ting phutaow! Yi ni ni yaoooow!"

  3. Brought a big box of paper so he could say, "I had a ream."

  4. ...walked around all day with a white mustache telling everyone, "MLK does a body good!"

    1. That was what I was gonna say! At least I can feel good knowing I think similarly to the punchline nuker of the year!

  5. ...praised James Earl Ray for being so articulate as Darth Vader and said it was too bad he was also such a good shot because no matter how clean you are... and then he was tasered by his Secret Service detail.

  6. ...burst into the SBLC memorial yelling "LEEEEEEEROY JENKINS!!!".

    (yeah, that was weak. Bob in PHX got this one. Whole slab of bacon for that one.)