Monday, May 6, 2013

Nuke the Punchline - Anger Management for Guns

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, so it is time to choose the winners of the last one:

To address gun violence in Chicago, Mayor Rahm Emanuel......

#5 D***cat:…threatened to stab anyone with a gun in Chicago.

#4 plentyobailouts.declared he was not aware of any gun violence and assured the press he would look into it.

#3 Dohtimes: …consulted with Hillary Clinton to find out which YouTube video was causing it.

#2 walruskkkch:…BAM! BAM! [what?] BAM! BAM! BAM! [I can't hear you] BAM! BAM! BAM! [over the gun fire.] BAM! BAM! BAM! [D*** Large cap mags]BAM! BAM!…..

And my favorite straight line of the day was from rodney dill:

To address gun violence in Chicago, Mayor Rahm Emanuel…had gun owners send their guns to anger management therapy.

COOKIES to rodney dill!

You should check out  Happy Cinco de Mayo!  by arik matthews. Cookies to Arik!


Thanks for your comments on Unny's Nuke the Punchline question.: )

What in the WORLD can we do to fix Anonymiss's funny (#47 and on)???  (I TOLD you guys she had no right to judge you. If you'd just listened to me we wouldn't be in this mess. Geez!)

Unnonymiss's favorite response was from Harvey

What in the WORLD can we do to fix Anonymiss's funny? Surely there's a government program for this... maybe she can sign up for a free ObamaFunny.

Unny thought that was a brilliant idea, Harvey.

Uncookies to Harvey!!!

My favorite responses were different, however...and since I AM the were some of the ideas I liked...

#3 Rodney Dill:...Fix her? That's just crazy talk.         [awwwww :)]

#2 a guy named Rob: replace her broken Humorous bone, which she whacked by accident while exuberantly using the grammar hammer.

and my favorite line was from my dwarf, Brashful.:

What in the WORLD can we do to fix Anonymiss's funny )??? ...Convince her to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Funny and Not Funny.  [where exactly do I find that tree, Arik? :)]

COOKIES to Arik!

Here's a new line for you to try:

Pet Food Stamps is a program President Obama...


  1. ...strongly supports. Fido can't be under-nourished when the president finally eats, I mean, meets him.

  2. ...allows you to send your pet almost anywhere in the U.S. via the USPS using only food stamps.

  3. showcase that wiener dogs is practically chicken.

  4. ...hailed as "the new Pet Rock".

  5. ...has created for Undogumented workers.

    P.S. That tree is in the Garden of (H)edon(ism).

  6. ...allows you to buy pets to use for food at a discount.

  7. ... denied was related to Welfur or Medicur.

    ... said was especially vital for poodles, who are at risk for SNAP.

    ... said needed a congressional watchdog.

    ... admitted was Biden the hand that feeds you.

    ... is Baracking up the wrong tree with.

  8. ...endorses for all Seniors who won't be able to afford food AND Obamacare.