Monday, December 16, 2013

Nuke the Punchline - Michelle Said She'd Help

Harvey over at IMAO has posted a new straight line of the day, so it is time to choose the winners of the last one:

The Most Embarrassing Moment at the Mandela Memorial Service…


#5 can of spam: … was Biden’s comments about how much he’ll miss that guy who hosted “Deal or No Deal”.

#4 Dohtimes:  …only eight DNC volunteers managed to get Mandela registered to vote in the next midterms.

#3 Oppo:… was when Biden said, “Let’s get this apartheid starteid!”

#2 Bob B: …was when Obama was doing his selfies, all the camera captured was an empty chair.

And my favorite straight line of the day was from rodney dill:

The Most Embarrassing Moment at the Mandela Memorial Service…Obama stating, “Man I would just die to be honored like this.” 

 Cookies to rodney dill!

and today's best kiss upper was walruskkkch:

The Most Embarrassing Moment at the Mandela Memorial Service…

walruskkkch: ...No Anonymiss cookies.
[That's right. Not a single one. :)]

Kiss Up Cookies to 
walruskkkch!
____________________

My favorite lines yesterday were from:


Billionaire Holiday Maven Martha Stewart fired 100 employees two weeks before Christmas because... 

Bob in Feenicks: ...they weren't fired, they were given 'Obamajobs.'

Dohtimes: ...they were the 100 who could afford not to shop at K-Mart.

and my favorite line from yesterday was from Harvey:

Billionaire Holiday Maven Martha Stewart fired 100 employees two weeks before Christmas because...They clashed with her stage-kitchen's backsplash. 

Kiss up cookies to:

Bob B.: ...her cookies didn't turn out as nice as Anonymiss's always do.

Mythilt: They told her the truth about Anonymiss's cookies...6x better tasting.
  
Cookies to Harvey and 
Kiss Up Cookies to Bob B. and Mythilt!
[By the way, thanks to Bob B and Steve H for volunteering to be guest judges. If anybody else would like a chance, let me know. I'll be getting in touch with you this week :) ]

____________________

Here's a new line for you to try:


A poll concluded Ted Cruz was the third most influential world leader in 2013, behind the Pope and Obama. Also on the list...

9 comments:

  1. The rodeo clown that wore the Obama mask.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ...the Fox, despite the fact that no one knows what he's saying:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jofNR_WkoCE

    ReplyDelete
  3. ... Grumpy Cat.

    ... Anonymiss, when she's baking cookies. (Not so much when she goes AWOL.)

    ... George W. Bush, since everything is still his fault.

    ReplyDelete
  4. ... Gotta be Chris Christie!!!

    Oh, sorry. I thought you wrote "inflatulent-al."

    ReplyDelete
  5. A poll concluded Ted Cruz was the third most influential world leader in 2013, behind the Pope and Obama. Also on the list...

    Chopped liver.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Twelve PC Norwegians,
    Eleven Hindis griping,
    Ten Tribal Lords a-leaping,
    Nine Saudis plotting,
    Eight despots stealing,
    Seven army puppets,
    Six progressives lying,
    Five Muslim thugs,
    Four figureheads,
    Three French Hens (They are chicken, you see)
    Two sanction seekers,
    And a Clinton with no moral core.

    ReplyDelete
  7. ...the guy who shot the Republican who is in charge of hurricanes.

    ReplyDelete
  8. ...John Kerry, who cleverly negotiated Iran down to everything they wanted.

    ReplyDelete