Friday, July 27, 2012

Nuke the Punchline: New Bumper Sticker on Obama's Limo

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

Did you see the new bumper sticker on Obama's limo?

#5 ccoffer: I didn’t see that. I thought I did, but I was just being selfish. Somebody else saw it for me.

#4 Son of Bob: I’d rather be raising taxes.

#3 Manolo: Dog is my co-pilot…and my snack.

#2 Lactose the Intolerant: Objects in this mirror are lefter than they appear.

And the best punchline goes to Mxymaster:

Did you see the new bumper sticker on Obama's limo? 'My other car is the bus you’re about to be under.'

Congratulations Mxymaster!

Now here is a line for you guys to play with:

Obama is proposing a new Olympic event...


  1. "Michelle's Biathlon" - Combines skiing in Vail with making someone else cover your expenses.

  2. Lactose the IntolerantJuly 27, 2012 at 6:53 PM

    Barak Biathalon: He skis up to people who won't buy his BS and shoots them.

  3. Lactose the IntolerantJuly 27, 2012 at 6:57 PM

    The Keynesian 100 M Dash: At the sound of the starter pistol, runners sprint backwards from the starting line and expect to somehow magically make it to the finish line.

  4. Lactose the IntolerantJuly 27, 2012 at 6:59 PM

    Liberal 10K: Runners take their marks, but the race never starts since the starter pistol was banned by Olympic gun control policy.

  5. But you have to enter it first before you know what's involved.

    The 100 m flip-flop.

    A hot dog eating contest. Really, hot dogs.

  6. He actually didn't propose a new event: He just proposes that everyone who wins medals gives them to others to spread the winning around.

  7. Gun Walking

    Debt-Ceiling High Jump

    Race Card Poker

  8. Progressive Slalom - Campaign left in primaries, hard right in general election, hard left to govern, hard right rhetoric before midterm elections, but the feet keep going left, hard left to supporters during the general election, but mainstream to everyone else.

    The final four months of the reelection campaign in the progressive slalom are a dizzyingly swift series of ideological turns. The eye can hardly perceive them, but the journalistic crowd always goes nuts.

  9. Unfortunately, the rulebook for it is 2,700 pages long and consists primarily of bribing Senators

  10. Obama is proposing a new Olympic event: The Hope-athon. Athletes qualify by how many books they publish and press releases they issue, the medals get handed out before the race actually starts, and the spectators are forced to watch the race over four agonizing years to see its dismal finish.