Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Shallow Thoughts by Lactose the Intolerant

You know, if a poorly made youtube video created such a firestorm in the middle east, I can hardly wait to see what happens after the premier of Parker’s and Stone’s next broadway hit, The Quran.
Maybe it’s just me, but anytime I see the photo of Bloomberg showing the different size soda cups along with those stacks of sugar cubes, it just makes me really, really thirsty.
But wait a minute. Sodas don’t even have sugar cubes in them.  They’re sweetened with corn.  And corn is on the foundational level of the food pyramid.  So am I supposed to have 5-7 servings of soda a day?  I’m so confused.
But wait another minute.  Can I get a Big Gulp of diet soda? Maybe I should read the ban before commenting on it. 
On another topic, I think I’ve come to the conclusion that our current ills can be laid at the feet of affirmative action.  Where would Barak be without affirmative action?  Instead of getting embarrassing grades at Harvard, he’d have gotten mediocre grades at the community college.  Not President material.
What would he be doing today, I wonder?  Probably putting his unique skill set to use to keep his choom stash stocked by selling as/is used cars to the guillible, prowling around the plasma donor center so he can intercept patrons as they leave to redistribute their wealth while they are in a weakened state, or hanging around the fringes of OWS with a cardboard sign reading: I HOPE you can spare some CHANGE.  Who can say?  Regardless, there is one thing we can be sure of.  Some communities in Chicago would be woefully disorganized.  Oh well. There are always trade offs.
Til later, derka, derka.


  1. You know I bet Parker and Stone have the... "stones" (pun in tended) to make that broadway show. their problem would be getting other people to be in it, and finding a place to put it on.

  2. I know. I heard they had a terrible time getting Team America past the censors.