Monday, December 17, 2012

For the Man Who Has Everything

Are you frantically looking for a cheap Christmas, Quanza, Hanukkah, Festivus, Wedding Anniversary, Funeral, Graduation, Birthday or Family Day gift for that person you just don’t like all that much?  Well, here is a good option for you.  I have written a book.  Any proceeds from this book will be going to the Perpetual Education Fund, which is a charity that provides loans to people in third world countries to help them get job training and an education to enable them to work their way out of poverty, so the purchase can do a little bit of good as well.  The book is on sale for the bargain price of $5.99 until Christmas after which the price will go up, so if you are feeling really charitable, wait until after Christmas to make the purchase.  I fell in love with this charity a long time ago and just wanted to try and raise some money and awareness.  I tried to sell my own hellions to raise money, but ebay kept taking down my posts, and now I can’t even sign in anymore, so I did this instead. Please spread the word around.  It’s for a good cause.

Book Description:

With home schooling becoming ever more popular, Uncle Sid brings his 16 years of experience dealing with hellions to bear in crafting this home schooling guidebook that will equip your own little hellions with the gritty, street smarts they will need to excel in the chaotic, urban landscape that is modern American society. For those who feel unqualified to home school their hellions, this book allows them to first teach themselves and then confidently educate the offspring the courts allege are theirs. The guide covers letters, mathematics, science, history, civics and even basic sexuality in a way that makes the knowledge accessible to the uneducated of all ages. To conclude, this is a home schooling guidebook that no sane parent would ever use to teach a child anything ever. (i.e. it is a parody)

The reviews are in:
Bob: I laughed.  I cried.  I failed my GED.  Then I bought this book.  I laughed. I cried.  I failed my GED again, but my ‘pharmaceutical’ distribution business has never been more profitable.  Thank you, Uncle Sid.
Sam: If this were a print book, it would be the perfect bathroom book.  However, as it is, I just badly soiled my kindle.

1 comment:

  1. If you like Lactose's stuff on here you'll love this. Buy one. Or two. Or a trillion...for all your closest enemies. Congrats Uncle Lactose!! :)