Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Nuke the Punchline: Al Quatwitter

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

The first tweet on Al Quaeda's new Twitter account...

#5 D***Cat: ...”DEATH TO TWITTER”

#4 Armed and Larry: ...Silence! I Keel you!

#3 Genghis Khen: ...I can haz all ur goatz.

#2 gsmtiger: ...This character limit goes against Allah!

And the best punchline goes to Oppo:

The first tweet on Al Quaeda's new Twitter account: "ha ha hashishtag get it give it here no its my turn give it 2 me let go ur going to break it im usin it wait ur turn k fine boom just kidding"

Congratulations Oppo.


The best punchline for the last Nuking Politics straight line was from Bob in Feekicks:    

When Joe Biden heard about the Pope... he asked, "Isn't he the guy who poops in the woods?"

Congratulations Bob.


Now here's a line for you guys to meddle with:

To prepare for his State of the Union Address, Obama...


  1. ...decided to figure out how to best use all the human props he invited by watching a Carrot Top DVD.

  2. ...once again wondered "Which union? Which state? Hope TOTUS knows. TOTUS always knows. Where's my binkie?"

  3. ...thought he should also give a nod to the Confederacy

  4. Spoke with the heads of the AFL/CIO, UFCW, & Teamsters to see how they were doing.

  5. invoked his Weingarten Rights.

  6. ...will put on his asbestos pants.

    ...will make sure Biden gets the proper dose of his medication. He doesn't want Joe to start laughing like a loon like he did in those debates with Ryan. MALARKEY! MALARKEY!