Wednesday, May 29, 2013

The Acceptance Speech

It is with great pleasure that I accept the hard earned victory in this battle of the sexes thing that Harvey made me do, which Anonymiss made him do, so in effect Anonymiss made me do. Once again, women making men do things.

But I won, so that means the old guard has still got it around here. I had to work really hard too. A lot of thought and preparation and time and blood and sweat and tears went into making those punchlines I did. And I got a lot of inspiration from you guys, my readers. I'd ask myself, I'd says "self? what would Bob in Feenicks or Rodney Dill write?". And of course I didn't know so I just came up with something on my own. Which took forever.

But I think I have defended my honor and like an old samurai, can pass on my scarred blade and retire to the fields to live out the rest of my days not doing any punchlines. My battle having been fought, and having faced down the newcomer, the supposed next great one, I have proven that I am still the greatest warrior in all of, um, something. I really ran out of steam on that horrible analogy.

Anyway, Anonymiss, well played.


  1. Well played yourself, there, Squawk.

    "I'd ask myself, I'd says "self?"

    Don't you mean "say"? :D

    1. Colloquial Speech is a literary device and used on purpose for an effect, and thus immune from the grammar hammer.

      Unless, that is, you take umbrage with the works of such authors as Mark Twain or John Steinbeck.