Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Dazzling. All You Need To Know.

A website, not known for it's conservative views, said recently  "....what's right about Obama?  His smile remains dazzling..."  This was convincingly offered as all that one might need to know about Mr. Obama's qualifications for the job he holds.

And yes, in all fairness, herewith is the dazzling proof:

No question about it.  But while that certainly stands as conclusive proof that he is qualified to be the President of the United States,  they might have included some other, equally compelling reasons.  Here are just a few, for which we have photographic documentation:

1.  His legs are approximately the same length.

2.  He's been on Letterman.

3.  He can ride a bike.

4.  He could take out Putin with his bare hands if he wanted to.

5.  He lives in a big house.

6.  Has exquisite taste in women.

7.  He's buds with important people like Joe Biden.

8.  He can work a teleprompter like nobody's business.

His detractors are quick to point out that, yes, he has been known to eat the occasional dog, he views the United States Constitution as "more what you'd call guidelines", and, while nobody is willing to discuss it openly, nobody seems to know where he was born.  Also they try to make a big deal out of the collapsing economy, the national debt, the fact that people like Putin can't stop laughing at us, and phony issues such as Benghazi and Obamacare.  But these desperate people are just grasping at straws in the face of that irrefutable dazzlingness.


  1. I was just doing my typical Tuesday night perusal of Wikipedia's entry for "Grammatical conjugation", when- what? It's Wednesday? OK - I was lying. Anyway... it seems to me that as applied to Obama, the term "dazzling" is inseparable from its infinitive root "to daze". In other words, this monster is aggressively and coercively bewitching his thralls in the media to carry out his malignant agenda. Or in yet more other words, "no surprise here - same song, have lost track of which verse we're on".

    Remember, when watching Obama, make sure you never look at him directly! ALWAYS use a mirror, preferably one upon which the Constitution has been etched.

  2. As W.C. Fields said, "If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with...Bush did it."

  3. And Obama has mastered it....