Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Anonymiss's Adventures in the ER

Having not been to a hospital in over 5 years, I thought it was time I go see how Obamacare had transformed things. So I thought, "Why not try out an ER?"

Well, I've never been in an ambulance, so I didn't know the drill. I'm not sure if it always took 5 strong firemen to transport one little lady. Maybe I need to step up my Zumba workouts?  Or perhaps that was an added Obamacare perk.  I have no complaints, however. They were kind and very attentive. The oxygen they administered did more good than anything that happened subsequently.

After they left, I was in a room for an hour or so waiting for the doctor. I'm not entirely sure of the time as I was a little, um... distracted. I got asked a lot of questions. There were a lot of signs and labels.  A lot of poking and prodding which seemed pretty hospital typical. When the doctor entered, he kept a safe distance. He didn't wear a mask, so I guess that makes sense. I may have been contagious. He also brought another man with him who he claimed was his "scribe".  Clearly, the NSA must keep records of the subversive behavior of all ER patients. Gurney-goers *are* a scary bunch.

Thankfully, the bed was mobile, as it made it easy to go on field trips. As we traversed the lovely hospital corridors (I bet Michelle chose that cheerful shade of off-green!), I got to see a lot of cool equipment. Huge scanners and gizmos were visible in the empty rooms we passed. I bet they were really inexpensive. The one in our destination room was less flashy, but apparently adequate. As the test commenced, the same question kept entering my mind, over and over....

If this is a hospital, where people's lives are literally at stake..
Where great pains are taken to ensure accuracy and where labeling and identification is so crucial...
Where gloves cost $53 a pair...

Who in the world let someone mark the cabinets in random positions like that, with labels stuck on with scotch tape?

It is enough to make a person seriously ill.


  1. In all seriousness, I hope you are well now.
    You are in my prayers.

  2. You are sweet. Thank you. All is well. :)

  3. Great relief to know you survived not only the condition that brought you to treatment, but the Obamacare-led treatment itself. Phew!

  4. I don't understand.... they have wee-bity manuals stuck in a box?

    Or one of the big fancy machines is called a 'small' and it takes multiple manuals for its correct operation?

  5. I'm glad to hear you're doing well.

  6. Joint Commission regulations require pretty much every container be labelled as to its contents. And, yeah, we mostly all use that same sort of sticky tape.

    Vastly inflated costs at a hospital are in large part due to minuscule Medicaid and Medicare reimbursements: Government healthcare programs pay only a fraction of what the hospitals pay their vendors for supplies and consumables, and those programs provide the majority of patients. So, you get to pay for the healthcare of others through your taxes, but through the prices you pay at the hospital as well. And the politicians take credit for "helping" people, while the providers get the blame.

    Hope your encounter was nothing too serious, and that your ambulance ride was merely precautionary.