Thursday, October 30, 2014

Nuke the Punchline - We've Got it Under Control

Harvey over at IMAO has posted a new straight line of the day, I believe. You should go check and make sure. My favorites from the last one are :

A New Government Study Shows That the Only Way to Kill Ebola…

I just couldn't narrow it down to 5. Here are 11 of my favorites, but truly, you should go read them all. Lots of great lines today :)

#11 HokieGomer:…with MORE COWBELL!!!

#10 Iowa Jim: . . . is to send it to the moon to be nuked.

#9 Burt: …You must be Fast and you must be Furious.

#8 Jeff in South Dakota:  ...Feed it under the guidelines of Moochelle’s school lunch program.

#7 Steve H: … create a government program to make it multiply.

#6 Chip:… Duct tape?

#5 Dohtimes: …a semi-withering glare from Fred Thompson.

#4 Gumbeaux: ...Have Obama sign an Executive Order removing “Ebola” from the dictionary.

#3 [Bonus] Bob in Feenicks:  …is to drive a wooden stake through its heart. -So we’re going to need millions of microscopic stakes and tiny hammers.

#3 Bob in Feenicks:…start a rumor that Ebola burned a Koran and let ISIS do all the work.  [I just couldn't decide which of these I liked better. I also liked the idea of infecting it with Lindsay Lohan. :P ]

#2 Bob B:  …has been suppressed in order to protect government union jobs.

And my favorite straight line of the day was from walruskkkch: 

A New Government Study Shows That the Only Way to Kill Ebola…have the government protect it, like Freedom.

 Cookies to walruskkkch!

...and Kiss up Cookies to Steve H, walruskkkch, rodney dill and Nucking Futs :) : 

A New Government Study Shows That the Only Way to Kill Ebola…

Steve H:  … is to taunt it by standing in front of it eating Anonymiss’s cookies. [That'd kill ANYTHING. :)]

walruskkkch: ... starve it of Anonymiss cookies. [That'll teach it! :P]

rodney dill: ... is to expose it to walnuts. [I *almost* feel sorry for it. :)]

Nucking Futs: ...  is to make it eat “commercial” cookies, not Anonymiss goodies… [A fate worse than death. :P]

Kiss Up Cookies to Steve H, 
walruskkkch, rodney dill, and Nucking Futs!


  1. We should introduce a new emoticon to the Internets.
    A colon, open paren, closed paren...


    Translation: Anonymiss cookie with sprinkles.

  2. I like it. :)

    It looks a bit like a big smile, too. :()