Wednesday, August 26, 2015

If You Give Hillary a Hashtag

If you give Hillary a hashtag,

She's going to want to tweet about it.

She'll need to use your computer, or one of her several smartphones,

And she'll want her own email server.

She'll probably feel like tweeting about some extremely recent tragedy to promote one of her long-standing agendas.

She's creative like that!

But still there's that little matter of needing her own email server.

Seriously. You won't talk her out of that.

She'll need to go pick one out, and you'll have to drive her.

She hasn't driven since 1996!

While you're out and about, she might want to stop and give a speech at a nearby college...

Helps with the pocket change, you know. Times are tight when you're so poor.

All that work can be so exhausting!

Don't you think she looks tired?

She'll probably want to call and check up on Bill, 

And when she does, you'd best hope code-name "The Energizer" doesn't answer his phone!

If that happens, Hillary will be sad.

And angry.  

Very, very angry!

She'll want to get this girl where she breathes! She'll want you to find this blonde-busty-babe "The Energizer", and she'll want her dead! She'll want her family dead! She'll want her house burned to the ground! She'll want her wanna go there in the middle of the night-, and you'll have to calm Hillary down before she chokes on her own bile and ruins the movie for the rest of us.

When she starts to cool off, show her her list of donors. 

That always brings a smile!

Be sure not to mention Trey Gowdy, Benghazi, or show her the latest polls!

Because when you do, she'll be sad.

To cheer her up, ask her about some leftist policy that's near and dear to her heart!

But when you do, she'll want you to give her a hashtag!


Once again, anyone want to take a crack at illustrating this?

Follow me @SantasTavern!

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