Friday, August 10, 2012

Tactical Nuke: Friday, August 10th, 2012

• I knew I forgot something yesterday, I just couldn't figure out what it was. I won't let it happen again, I "promise". I miss one tactical nuke, and Walkingdead is already assuming I am dead and is trying to take over.

• Yay! The USA women won gold in soccer again. You may be wondering why we would win a gold in soccer, when the rest of the world considers the US to be horrible at soccer. Well, it's simple.

Americans consider soccer to be a kids' and women's sport. Men play real football. But women don't really play football professionally, so we can spare a lot of great female athletes for a US soccer team. And of course, when we put our best up against the rest of the world, we always win. The stuff we don't win at is the stuff we don't care about.

Like everything that China wins. We just don't care about that stuff. Diving, for example, is way too much like running away from a grenade or something. It's Un-american.

• America is officially ahead of those red Chinese commies in total medals and gold medals. We knew this would happen eventually, as the United States is superior to their silly communist system, but it is still fun to keep track of. I mean, since the Cold War, that is really the only reason to watch the Olympics, right? To see how badly the United States whoops the commies?

54% of Americans recently polled think the TSA is doing either an excellent job or a good job. If that doesn't prove how meaningless and untrustworthy polls are, I dunno what does.

1 comment:

  1. Hey that's not fair. I also said you could be in jail.

    also, I wasn't trying to take over... just give the people what they want. Honestly if I gave the people what they wanted the only writing they would get would be my resignation.