Monday, August 27, 2012

Nuke the Punchline: Obama Presidential Seal

Harvey over at IMAO has another straight line of the day up, and so it is time to pick the winners of the last one:

President Obama changed the design on the Presidential Seal...

#5 plentyobailouts: ...The eagle is reading from a prompter.

#4 blarg: ...instead of an eagle holding arrows and an olive branch it’s a kitten holding a food stamp. Instead of “e pluribus unum” it says “I can haz cheezburger?”

#3 Mrs. C: ...to the Paypal “donate” button.

#2 Bob in Feenicks: ...It’s now an image of a ‘chooming unicorn, with a rainbow coming out of its butt, redistributing a bag of money it just stole from a business owner, who is now putting up a ‘Out of Business’ sign, to all the newly unemployed workers. Plus an image of a roasted dog below that.

And the best punchline goes to HokieGomer:

President Obama changed the design on the Presidential Seal. It replaces the eagle with a dodo bird holding a hammer and sickle in one claw and a sprig of choom in the other. Imposed behind the dodo is a wind turbine and all surrounded by 57 stars. The scroll above the dodo reads Quas non aedificastis ut! Translated: “You didn’t build that!

Congratulations HokieGomer!

Now here's a line for you folks to play with:

In the secret Vice President's bunker, Biden...

11 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. ... grew to consider the padded walls "reassuring".

      Delete
  2. Can finally be himself instead of having to make Obama look good. He's currently studying the findings of CERN's boson particle project checking for possible errors at his desk where he has his signed photo of Steve Jobs thanking him for the assist in developing the Iphone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. looked for the secret vice president.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hears the phrase "Same thing we do every day, Pinky"...
    And responds "Help Michelle in the White House Garden?"

    ReplyDelete
  5. ...is hissing and clawing at the smug looking bastard smirking at him in the mirror.
    ...is crying, screaming for help, and pounding on the inside of the bathroom door after noticing that he accidentally locked it.
    ...is fleeing the kitchen after somehow managing to set the counter on fire while preparing tea for a "Cabinet Meeting" with his stuffed animals.

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  6. ...Finally got his very own McDonalds-type 'Happyland' installed.

    ...Sits patiently waiting for Obama to call for him using the "Biden-Signal" -anytime now...

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  7. plays with his legos

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  8. ... noticed the chamber has no windows and no doors, which offers him this chilling challenge: to find a way out! Bwahahaha
    (http://www.doombuggies.com/media_audio_ridetranscript.php)

    ... rewriting his speeches so they are not in Harry Reid's handwriting.
    (http://www.nytimes.com/1987/09/18/us/biden-admits-plagiarism-in-school-but-says-it-was-not-malevolent.html?pagewanted=all&src=pm)

    ReplyDelete
  9. liked the mask but not the jacket so much when Obama made him play the Silence Of The Lambs game.

    ReplyDelete