The past few years had been unkind to her, as only advanced age can be, but when the time came she was ready. Lord, she was ready. Like a culmination of her life's work in God's hands, as she lay on her deathbed, some of her grandchildren began to sing "It Is Well With My Soul".
I did my best to sing with them, but I couldn't get the words out most of the time as I saw her gaze fixed upon us, struggling for life's last moments. It was the most beautiful and the most sad thing I've ever heard. I can't know what she was thinking, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was "Jesus, I am ready."
Her real lesson in life, as I saw it, was acceptance and unconditional love. If she was ever judgmental of others, I never saw it. A lot of us Christians read about, hear about, and believe in the unconditional love of Christ. But few of us, including myself, really put that to practice very well. It's so easy to come up with conditions.
I'll love you, if you love me back. I'll love you if you live your life a certain way. I'll love you, if you believe as I do. I'll love you if you meet certain conditions. Not so my grandma. She'd love you because.
And now she is in Heaven, with Christ, who loves all because.
Condolences. You were blessed with a rare treasure in her. The world would be a much better place if more people had perfect examples instead of just edifying words, or more often, no good examples at all.
ReplyDeleteI was reading about the man who wrote "It Is Well With My Soul." He was financially ruined by the Great Chicago Fire, and the song was written after he lost his four daughters in a shipwreck. Sometimes the greatest good comes from great loss.
My condolences, Keln.
ReplyDeleteAs I'm fairly certain I've stated once or thrice around here, I have no faith or belief in life after death, I have the knowledge and experience that it exists and is real.
There's an open secret: Most people I talk to, of many different faiths, believe that the loved ones who have gone before us watch over us. I have experience that this is true, as well. It's more complicated than that, but there is far more interplay between this world and the next than most people fathom.
Creation is complex and wonderful and so much more than what is quantifiable and the hardest thing is that most of us don't have eyes to see. If we did, hardly one of us would be able to deny the amazing gifts that God has given us, and his love for all of us, every one.
I don't think Grandma will be watching over us. She spent her life doing that. She's now with Christ, and she has better things to do. But I bet her laughter echoes sweetly in the halls of Heaven.
DeleteI'm so sorry, Keln.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to feel so happy and so sad at the same time. It sounds like you have lovely memories of her that you can treasure and share.
Thank you for your sweet post.